CHAPTER 30: . “GOODBYE CRUEL WORLD!”…
By admin On March 3rd, 2021.
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It’s time to get to the final act of this story. Now it is the moment of truth, as far as this e-book is concerned.
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And so now it’s time to wrap this story together. So let’s get to it and complete this story and tie up the remaining loose ends, bringing this story full circle …
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The Scream – Wikipedia – public domain – by edvard munch – c.1893
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CHAPTER 30:
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“GOODBYE CRUEL WORLD!”…
(Title of the 1979 Pink Floyd song)
Jukebox – Wikimedia – cropped image – Creative Commons Attribution-Share Alike 4.0 Global license
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July 1980
(almost 9 months after my troubles began)
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MY TERROR ENDS…
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Well, after the Devil ceased his condemnation that I was Adolph Hitler in my former life, things began to go well for me.
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As a matter of fact, I was feeling so good, I became a general nuisance around the hospital ward. For one thing, I started a ‘petition-signing’ amongst the patients when the hospital started serving us these pathetic tofu squares at breakfast, instead of the scrambled eggs they previously served!
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And then also, I began giving my own counselling sessions to one or two patients. The staff told me nicely to “cease and desist”.
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Hey, you’d-a thought they’d like the extra help!
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At no charge!
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Go figure!
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“I COME TO THE GARDEN”
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Becky came to visit and we decided to go sight-seeing in Portland. We found a large shrine called Mother Mary’s Grotto. It was a big garden that you could walk through with different shrines dedicated to various aspects of the Gospel. It was a really beautiful shrine, with lots of really nice statues. And since I didn’t actually kill the Virgin Mary (as the Devil mercilessly accused me. See “Fantasy Island” for explanation), .
I could now visit this shrine without any dread.
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We then went to a large chapel where people were entering. And so I asked Becky to go with me. I was really excited to hear a Bible sermon! After all, through my ordeal, all I ever heard in English was the Devil’s sermons, so to speak! So a real biblical sermon was “just what the Doctor ordered!”
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But as we took our place in this church, the minister, or priest, or whatever, began speaking in some foreign language! Latin, or Greek or something! And then, we all got up in line to go by the priest, who handed us each a wafer and a tiny cup of grape-juice!
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And then, to my disappointment, the service ended and everyone began leaving. I really wanted to hear a sermon…in English! Oh well. I guess I would just have to wait!
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Photo of similar Mary shrine courtesy Wikipedia share-alike license. Click here for link.
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HOLY SHMOKES!
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After this, we went into a gift shop where I bought 3 or 4 Bibles and maybe a dozen large crucifixes on necklace chains. As I was coming out of the gift shop I saw a priest. I asked him if he would bless these Bibles and necklaces. He made some gestures with his hands and said some things. I thanked him. But as I walked away, I noticed this priest was lighting up a cigarette. Well, I didn’t know hardly anything about Christianity, but I guess I always viewed smoking as a sin. And for such a holy-man, a Christlike individual, to be smoking really disappointed me, causing me to think his blessing on my Bibles and crucifixes was not so much of a blessing.
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And so, here was my first Christian-encounter with hypocrisy (not his, but my own hypocrisy, since I myself was still currently smoking!)
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Marlboro – Wikipedia – Creative Commons Attribution-Share Alike 3.0 Unported license
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“CRUCIFIXES FOR THE WHOLE HOUSE!!…
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NAW…DON’T WORRY!…I’M BUYING!!”…
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When I got back to the hospital ward, I waited until the patients and staff were all together in the living area. I then gave a crucifix necklace to each patient and each staff-member. I suppose I should have bought smaller crucifixes. These over-sized crucifixes were about 2 or 3 inches tall. But hey, it’s the thought that counts. Everyone was obviously so overwhelmed with gratitude, that they didn’t know what to say! LOL!
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TIME TO GO…
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After thirty days, the hospital staff told me I was well enough to leave. I told them that I was still hearing that voice. But they still insisted that I was well enough to leave. And it was a lucky thing I left when I did! Because when checking out at the front desk, the receptionist informed me that my 30-day-insurance-coverage ran out that very same day!
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A FEW THOUGHTS…
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I was more than a little disappointed that virtually nobody in the hospital staff believed I was being tormented by a devil. It was assumed that my problem was a mental condition. There were instances, however, in which I received good spiritual advice.
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On the other hand, I was treated very nicely by everyone. By far this was the most polite staff I’ve ever encountered!
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July/August 1980
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“YOU TALK TOO MUCH…YOU WORRY ME TO DEATH!”
(First line from the 1960 song by Joe Jones, “You Talk Too Much”)
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And so I returned to Klamath Falls. But the voice didn’t go away. He just kept talking and talking. After some weeks, I became overwhelmed with the fear that I was like a man with a very contagious, killer-disease: namely…I HAD THE DEVIL IN ME!!! I had the “disease of Satan”, which seemed to indwell me to some degree. Well, he had to indwell within me, didn’t he? After all, he could talk to me (in my mind). And he could somehow put thoughts into my mind. And somehow he seemed to know many things I was thinking.
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As the days went by, the voice didn’t go away. I decided that I needed to do something to rid myself of this satanic voice. I decided to go back up to Portland to the Multnomah Falls. It was where that Indian jumped off to save the rest of the tribe from some disease. Even though that legend was a little suspect, nevertheless, this still seemed like a fitting place to end my life. And I too would be engaging in a “noble act” by eliminating this satanic voice that was speaking through me, and to me. I suppose, in the back of my mind, I was doing what I’d seen in that movie, The Exorcist, when Father Karras was filled with the Devil and jumped to his death, onto the streets far below.
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Jukebox – Wikimedia – cropped image – Creative Commons Attribution-Share Alike 4.0 Global license
Christian and Apollyon – Pilgrim’s Progress – Wikipedia – US Public Domain
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“THE WORDS OF THE PROPHETS ARE WRITTEN ON THE SUBWAY OLD BARN WALLS…(and horse’s stalls)!”
(Word-play on lyrics from the 1964 Simon & Garfunkel mega-hit, “The Sounds of Silence”)
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As I was driving up to Portland on Interstate 5 (still very intent on doing myself in), something caught my attention. An old barn…sitting off to the west of the Interstate 5 freeway…in a field…just south of Salem…a barn…standing there as a monument to days-gone-by. And as I drove by, I was surprised to see a Bible concept inscribed on its old weathered wooden walls. Someone had painted the following sentence on the side of that old relic…
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Jukebox – Wikimedia – cropped image – Creative Commons Attribution-Share Alike 4.0 Global license
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“SOLDIERS OF THE CROSS…ARMOR UP…THE TIME IS AT HAND”
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These words made a strong impact on me, at that moment. “Profound statement!”, I thought to myself. “Whoever painted those words must also be aware that Judgment Day is at hand.”
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But now, I had a little hope. “That inscription on that old barn just might be the answer to my problems.” I might have thought… ”put on the armor of God. Very interesting concept. Hm-mm.”
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ONE MORE TRAIL TO CLIMB
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Upon arrival at the falls, I looked up and saw that the trail to the top was going to be a good climb. But hey, I climbed for eight hours up from the bottom of the Grand Canyon (see Chapter 1)! And this climb would only take an hour or so.
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Probably the voice was talking to me all the way along the trail upward. The climb was steep but very scenic with lots of beautiful trees, shrubs and ferns, etc.
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But the sun was going down, and I knew I had better “high-tail” it up this hill before it got too dark!
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(Multnomah Falls photo: Kelvin Kaye). Photo on right by www.oregon.com.
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BACK TO WHERE THIS STORY BEGAN…
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Well that’s my story! Now you know the basics of what I’ve gone through for over a year.
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So can you really blame me for wanting to take a plunge to my death?
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How would you have handled this, if you were in my shoes?
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When I think back on it all, it seems like a dream…a really bad dream! But I found out, that the truth is stranger than fiction! And now this will hopefully be over for good! And hopefully I will die a death that will separate me for all eternity from this voice! From this spirit! And from this Devil!
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It’s now time for me to take this leap of faith. “Lord, forgive me and receive me into your eternal kingdom….”
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My body plunges down into the water…
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…In a moment my head bobs out of the water. Hands begin to clap upon the announcement…
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“Welcome Chuck! Welcome into the family of God!”
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I carefully inspect my baptismal robe to see if every inch has water on it. I don’t want even one inch of my body to be unbaptised.
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NEW LIFE IN JESUS AHEAD
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What happened to jumping off the falls, you ask?
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Oh that! Yeah! You’re asking if I jumped off the falls. Well, no, I didn’t. What happened is this: I got to about half way up the trail, and it was getting dark. And frankly, I lost heart, and decided not to jump. So I climbed back down and drove back home to Klamath Falls.
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And then back in Klamath, I decided to start going to church in a little Baptist congregation. And after a short time, I decided the best way to rid myself of this spirit that’s been plaguing me for over a year was to die; that is, I would “die in Jesus”. I would go to that watery grave of Baptism. And so here I am! At a Baptist church! Getting baptized! That would be my final plunge! What better way to get rid of Satan than to take a plunge to almost certain death…a death that leads to life… a new life in the Lord Jesus Christ!
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But after the baptism, I’m noticing a dry spot on my baptismal robe. I ask the Pastor later if that mattered. He says “No”.
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Still it bothered me.
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LITTLE FLY FREED BY BIG GOD…
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So I guess you could say that God plucked me out of Satan’s spider-web.
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Oh the mercy of God to a very miserable wretch like me, who wasn’t even looking for God!
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Could I have stood up to Satan on my own? The “Mental Ward Games” only proved that I was no match for Satan. I miserably lost the contest! But who wouldn’t have lost the contest with the Devil? He’s way out of my league…and yours too! There’s only One who could defeat Satan. And to my great joy, that One defeated him on that hill called “Calvary”. And that One defeated the Devil, on your behalf, and on my behalf.
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And though I was cast into “Tophet” (see Jeremiah 7:32), and tormented by fire and brimstone, I nevertheless came out of it unharmed. And the smoke of my torment will rise up forever and ever, no doubt. This awful lesson-book of sin will never be forgotten! And I learned a lesson that I’m sure I won’t forget through the days of eternity. And I’m telling you this story because you should be aware of just who is this “Wicked One” who has seemingly all but erased himself out of existence; because even though he’s covered his tracks pretty well, he’s still out there working his deceptive and destructive satanic arts upon this unsuspecting world.
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But I’m also telling this story so that maybe, just maybe some person, living in unbelief and atheism like I was, might turn from their sin, becoming a Follower of Jesus.
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But don’t wait till Judgment Day!
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And truth-be-told, ya never know when your Judgment Day begins!
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“What? Did you (the readers) say something? I thought I just heard a voice. Everyone be quiet for a moment.”
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“Are you still here Satan? Is that you, Satan?”
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(Silence for a moment.)
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“I’m still he-e-e-r-re !!”
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THE END…
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Dear Reader: A question still lingers. And that question is this…
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“Who will be next to take a ride in an “RX-7” (an “Our Ex-Heaven”)?”
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Well if you do, just make sure NOT to be like me.
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Yeah, don’t you get caught on that day without having on your “Armor of God”!
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